Girls as young as three are already "emotionally invested" in being thin, according to a small study of 55 preschoolers.
I really didn't expect kids this young to even notice what weight someone was. But then again, our culture has become obsessed with body image, so does this really surprise anyone?
The girls behavior indicated they did not even want to be friends with someone who was "fat". Given the extent of our current obesity epidemic, that is particularly worrying. I mean, what kind of relationships will today's children form in later years with an attitude like this at such a young age?
They also played a game of Chutes and Ladders, or Candy Land, where they had to choose game pieces, designed for the task, varying only in body type (thin, average, and fat). Lead researcher Jennifer Harriger, of Pepperdine University in Malibu, said this:
Interestingly, several participants were reluctant to even touch the fat game piece... For example, one child selected the thin piece as the girl she wanted to 'be' to play the game. When I presented her with the fat piece and asked her if she was willing to switch, she crinkled her nose and she reached around my hand, avoiding touching the fat piece altogether, picked up the average-size piece and said, 'No, I won't switch with you, but I will be this one instead.'... Other participants made comments such as, "I hate her, she has a fat stomach," or "She is fat. I don't want to be that one." (LiveScience)So, what can we do to remedy this problem?Here are a few suggestions to help your child develop a healthy body image:Eat together at mealtimes -- families who eat together are less likely to suffer from eating issues.Don't make comments about your own weight, or the weight of others. So, no talking about how fat your stomach is, or how you really shouldn't be eating this piece of cake.Encourage your children for what they do, not what they look like.Make the focus on improving their health, not losing weight.Be a role model -- eat healthy foods and take some exercise.Limit your child's exposure to mainstream media, which tends to have a strong emphasis on thin models, or an unhealthy focus on body image.Help your children find something they can take pride in -- having a sense of accomplishment helps improve self-esteem.I read a comment from one reader on this topic who said, "Do people really think this is bad? We're constantly told about the childhood obesity epidemic, and now we think it's bad because they want to be thin?"
What are your thoughts on this reader's attitude? Do you agree?
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Body Image body image childhood obesity 19 Comments Spectra on 19 Nov 2010I think it's a little bit obsessive for us to worry about what little kids think of their bodies. Honestly, as a kid, I didn't care about my body but I also didn't want to be fat. I think there was one kid in my kindergarten class that was overweight and I do remember thinking that I didn't want to look like that girl. But I never really thought much about my own body--I was able to do pretty much every physical activity any other kid could do. I was not a fat kid; I was maybe a little on the stocky side, but that's still true for me.
The best thing we can do as a society is to feed our kids wholesome, nutritious foods and keep them active so they don't HAVE to worry about being the fat kid. I don't know about you, but when I was 4, I didn't have much choice in what I ate for meals/snacks. My parents chose well, I suppose. We also need to limit kids' exposure to media relating to weight/size. I think a lot of kids probably inadvertently get exposed to some of these ideas by watching "The Biggest Loser" with their parents, etc. Part of being a parent is to raise your kids in a way so that they don't get fat to begin with.
Reply Sara on 19 Nov 2010It scares me because while my daughter isn't overweight, she is built differently. It is obvious even now. She is taller and with a larger bone structure and more musculature than all the other little girls. She is not even three but it is obvious. It has her benefits playing, in that she can play with older children and boys and hold her own. She is the most active little girl I have ever seen and eats healthfully... but she will never be thin. She is just not built to be thin. Not fat, perhaps, but definitely large... I hate to think of her being possibly discriminated against for being different in appearance, despite her sweet and friendly personality, over something she has no control over.
Of course, overweight toddlers have no control over it either. Only their parents.
Ahh, raising healthy, happy children who take care of themselves but know their value extends far beyond appearance and like themselves and that it's okay to be different... seems so difficult sometimes!
Reply O. on 19 Nov 2010You had better have the talk with your daughter now Sara. I had posted here a couple of days ago about how any woman who is not "petite" whether they are really fat or not ( Khloe Kardashian, Serena Williams) is being called "fat" none the less.
You should teach your daughter that she has got to hold her own because until men can go to a supermarket and get a can of "Tall Fast" it's not going to get any better.
Reply Melanie Thomassian R.D. on 23 Nov 2010Hi Sara,
I often feel a bit overwhelmed by raising a child too. But, I believe leading by example is one of the most influential things you can do for your child's future health and happiness.
Research shows that kids who grow up overweight fight it all their lives.
Reply Jen on 22 Nov 2010I have to agree, part of being a parent is to raise your kids in a way so that they don't get fat to begin with.
They get their awareness from parents.
Jen
These children who were studied have all learned to be judgmental and mean to others from their parents. People who don't fit the mold their perfect parents want are rejected, ridiculed and have comments made about them that kids know are bad and don't want made about them. The reason kids care about being thin is because other people are pushing that on them and their parents are NOT doing their job in helping their child to accept everyone for their individual differences. I fee sorry for these kids because my daughter isn't going to be one of them and she is one of the happiest children I have ever seen and she already shows great empathy for others when they are bullied, etc. She isn't fat either, or thin, she is at what her doctor calls a perfect weight for her age and size. I am ashamed of some parents that I meet for the pressure they put on their kids and the example they set for what behavior is acceptable.
Reply richards89 on 22 Nov 2010this is nice
Reply bijou on 22 Nov 2010This comes as no surprise. As a 3-year-old in the mid eighties, I was acutely aware that a) I did not look like Miss America and b) that looking like Miss America was a very desirable thing. I couldn't even read at three years old yet I knew I was chubby. I carry that sense of inadequacy until this day - I still avoid watching beauty pageants because they trigger a cascade of self-loathing.
Reply Melanie Thomassian R.D. on 23 Nov 2010Bijou,
Do you have children of your own now? I'm just wondering does your experience as a child make you do or say things differently to prevent them having the same feelings as you did?
No, I don't have kids, and probably won't have them for at least a few years. When I do have them, I plan on not commenting on people's (my own and everyone else's) body sizes at all - just serving them healthy wholesome real food (not "kid" food) and emphasizing exercise as a lifestyle. However, now that I think of it, I don't remember my own mother ever saying anything about my 3-year-old body (though she probably did comment as I got older). I was just watching TV and self-awareness kicked in. Some people may suggest banning TV from kids, but that only works for so long. Aside from leading by example, I suppose the most I can do is correct any misperceptions they may have about body weight and shape as they grow up.
Reply anonomous on 22 Nov 2010I am very thin and was very thin growing up, so i was one of the more popular kids. However i accepted everyone - despite thier weight - into my group. The "fat kids" were always welcome, epecially sice they tended to be nicer than the "cute kids". I cannot believe our children would be more than welcoming to those kids who are over weight. This is truly a shock.
Reply MJ on 23 Nov 2010Did they take into account what the children choosing looked like themselves ?
Little one tend to identify with dolls, figures and other children who are similar to them.
I didn't see this mentioned, I think this is an important variable, it actually changes the whole study.
This is a very poorly put together study. It completely discounts kids' abilities to take other factors into account. Kids are smarter than most adults give them credit for.
Reply Julia on 25 Nov 2010I was always very thin (still am) and was not popular as a young child. I was actually teased for being "skinny" a good bit. So being thin doesn't guarantee popularity either.
Reply malak on 27 Nov 2010but i know people that dont like girls that that skinny they say it makes them look like a skeleton. thats mean and i wouldnt want anyone to call me that.
Reply Barry on 25 Nov 2010Everybody seems to have some whiney mumbo-jumbo about the pressures of body image, etc. If you had a choice, wouldn't you rather have your kids be skinny than fat? Being fat is unhealthy both physically and mentally. I'm 41 and when I was a kid we might have had one "fat" kid in the classroom. As I see it, people that accept obesity are indirectly promoting it.
Reply Sandy on 27 Nov 2010I have a vivid memory of my four-year-old birthday party--thin little me and three thin friends held my bedroom door shut, refusing to let the fat girl out to play with us, because she was fat. I honestly don't think I had learned this from my parents--it was some sort of sick instinct, fueled by gang-mentality. I am so ashamed whenever I think of it. Karma got me back by making me gain about 50 pounds after the birth of my children that seems to be stuck on me forever.
Reply Rob on 29 Nov 2010Being thin is nice, but worrying about it at that age is sad to me. Make it a lifestyle as an adult and be a good example. The site that has helped me the most - and pennies a day: www.gregsworkout.com
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